Neil Simon’s ‘Rumors’ @ Garland Civic Theatre
—Carol M. Rice
Neil Simon is considered by many to be the master of modern comedy. While the 1960s were definitely his heyday, I believe his genius is at its height with Rumors, his 1988 farcical masterpiece about four wealthy couples who have gathered to celebrate the tenth anniversary of friends. There’s one tiny problem, though — the host of the party has shot himself in the ear, and the hostess and the help are nowhere to be found.
Garland Civic Theatre’s hilarious production takes place on a stunning set designed by Eddy Herring, who also directs. It’s obvious even before lights go down that these are wealthy people with taste and panache. It’s only once we meet Herring’s amazing cast that things begin to go sidewise.
And go sideways they do — FAST!
Robert San Juan starts us off as an extremely frazzled Ken, who has discovered his friend Charlie covered in blood in his bedroom. Apparently shooting yourself in the earlobe will cause it to bleed A LOT! San Juan keeps the pace up from the start even while constantly running up and down the stairs to communicate with his wife Chris, played by Leigh Wyatt Moore. Chris’s intense hunger for a cigarette (after quitting 18 months prior) lets us know exactly what we’re in for. Moore and San Juan make a believable couple, complete with much onstage bickering. I will say that when Ken loses his hearing, he often becomes unintelligible, and we lose several laugh lines because of it.
Amy Parsons and Blair Mitchell arrive as Claire and Lenny — Lenny having totaled his brand-new BMW en route. Parsons and Moore have great chemistry as gossipy friends, while Mitchell does his best to adapt to the unraveling situation as Lenny. His long monologue at the end of the show is ridiculously funny, complete with a Ralphie-from-A Christmas Story-vibe (he’s in a pink bunny suit), which only adds to the humor.
Bill Sizemore and Molly Bower play the most bizarre couple of the bunch, Ernie and Cookie Cusack. She’s wearing an...interesting dress passed down from her Polish grandmother and has random back spasms, resulting in her contorting her body to feel relief, while he’s on the phone with one of his therapy groups. Sizemore and Bower have given Ernie and Cookie a very sweet, loving relationship that contrasts nicely with the others’ constant lashing out.
Finally, Glenn and Cassie Cooper arrive. He’s running for state senate, and his younger, pretty wife is mad at him for a suspected affair. Sean M. Lewis beautifully plays Glenn with pompous cluelessness, while Chloe Carroll portrays Cassie as a lower-class...not quite bimbo, but close. These two give the others a run for their money when it comes to arguing, as they never quit, yet Lewis and Carroll keep things fresh, never letting their fights devolve into mere shouting at each other.
The Coopers may be the last guests, but they’re not the last people to arrive. Inevitably, the police show up. Michael McMillan plays the suspicious Officer Welch with both authority and charisma. This is one of those roles that can easily be an afterthought, but McMillan gives a brilliant, memorable performance in his brief time onstage.
As Welch’s sidekick Officer Pudney, Erik Ho has fantastic facial expressions and plays up the physical comedy.
Complementing Herring’s set are Kerra Sims’s spot on costumes. The men’s sharp tuxedos match nicely with the ladies’ formal wear. Beyond the aforementioned costumes, Carroll’s skin-tight dress is especially nice and lets us know before she opens her mouth what kind of woman she is.
Allison Larrea’s lighting design works well to accentuate the set and cast, but I wish there had been more light on the landing — though I’m not sure how it could have happened, with the top of the set so close to the ceiling. Props by Mark Hawkins have the right moneyed look, and Edgar Hernandez’s sound design is fun, especially the music for the dancing scene.
Eddy Herring has put together a dynamite production. If the Saturday night crowd when I attended is any indication, Garland Civic Theatre has a big hit on their hands with Rumors, and that’s as it should be. This is one of the best productions of Simon’s popular farce that I’ve ever seen.
WHEN: March 13-29, 2026
WHERE: 300 North 5th Street (Granville Arts Center), Garland TX
WEB: garlandcivic.org
